Negotiating Techniques in Interpersonal Relations
He who has learned to disagree without being disagreeable has discovered the most valuable secret of being a diplomat.
– Robert Estabrook
Introduction
We can put in our best effort to convince others to take our stance, but what if the opposing party is just as confident? Then it’s time to try your hand at some haggling! In this lesson, we will go over some fundamental negotiating techniques that can assist you in achieving the best bargain for yourself as well as engaging the other party in an amiable discussion. These skills can help you achieve both of these goals.
Strong interpersonal skills are a necessity for a successful negotiator. Your ability to negotiate successfully will be much enhanced if you broaden your understanding of different cultures and negotiating tactics.
Your ability to negotiate effectively can earn you additional customers, prospects, and even jobs. It has the potential to mediate conflicts, locate areas of compromise, and, outside of the workplace, perhaps secure you a better deal on a new vehicle.
It is safe to conclude that the majority of people who enter into negotiations do so with the intention of emerging successful. To get these goals, on the other hand, can be a challenge that many people are unable to surmount.
Many times, interpersonal skills are included under the larger category of social skills, also known as the characteristics of a “people person.” In addition to helping you communicate more clearly and effectively, developing your interpersonal skills will also increase your ability to recall information and concentrate. Someone who is skilled in the use of these strategies will:
Employ skills such as active listening.
Keep a level head, show some compassion, and be adaptable.
Recognize your need to lead and take responsibility.
Maintain a reputation for being reliable and helpful to the team.
These are all wonderful traits to have in a co-worker or peer, but they come in especially helpful during the negotiation process.
Why are interactions with other people so crucial to the bargaining process?
Many people who claim to despise bargaining do so because they are afraid of getting into a fight. In point of fact, only a very small percentage of people will admit that they take pleasure in competing against, outsmarting, or deceiving another human being.
These frightening confrontations can be transformed into pleasant conversations with the development and refinement of one’s talents. Let’s take a look at the outcomes of having great interpersonal skills and how these transfer into successful negotiations.
Active Listening. Listeners who are not actively participating may smile and nod while internally formulating their next remark or making mental preparations for dinner. On the other hand, active listeners fully concentrate their attention on all of the information that is being communicated to them. They maintain an active engagement with the speaker, ask insightful questions, and take thorough notes when it is essential.
Adhering to these standards is more than just the courteous thing to do. You will be able to make better business judgments if you check to see that you have understood the information that has been provided to you. You will come across as more kind and kind to others, which will, in turn, strengthen the connection you have with potential partners.
Flexibility, patience, and understanding for others. When negotiations carry on for several hours, the area in which they take place runs the risk of becoming monotonous.
The ability to be patient, demonstrate empathy, and maintain flexibility in spite of reduced lunch breaks or endless arguments will help to ease the pressures associated with these boardroom situations.
If you are able to master these talents, you will be able to maintain your composure even when faced with challenging situations. You will have an easier time resisting the temptation to just give in and settle with deals that are careless or unsatisfactory.
Leadership and taking responsibility for one’s actions. Your self-assurance in your skills as a negotiator will equip you with the ability to go into leadership roles. You will also become more self-conscious as a result of these skills, and as a result, you will become more aware of the shortcomings that you possess. In times like those, it is absolutely necessary to take responsibility for the actions you have taken.
Others’ faith in you and their estimation of your moral fiber will grow as a direct result of your consistent demonstration of openness and honesty in all aspects of your professional life. Partners will be more eager to work with you and take a risk on you when it comes to striking a compromise or a transaction.
An impression of dependability. In negotiations, it is common to ask the other party to invest their time, money, or energy into what you have to offer. Communicators who are distracted, standoffish, and shifty do not give off an impression of dependability. Your value can be communicated more effectively throughout each and every conversation by making use of your interpersonal skills.
Interpersonal skills are important for a number of reasons, including helping you keep your head in the game and gaining respect from others; therefore, they should always have a place at the table…regardless of where in the globe that table may be.
Your ability to communicate, or lack thereof, can make or break transactions and leave you dissatisfied with the hand you’ve been dealt. Your ability to interact with other people effectively is among the most important of these talents.
What’s the takeaway here? When it comes to successful negotiations, the application of interpersonal skills is a requirement that cannot be waived. The following stages of negotiation help to maintain interpersonal skills.
Preparation (Unanimous agreements)
During the phase of preparation, one has already won half the battle of the negotiations. Consider it to be analogous to the process of formulating a strategy before going to battle. It is essential to have a thorough understanding of not just your own capabilities but also those of the other party before engaging in a conflict. You will gain the knowledge necessary to determine which strategy to implement as a result of this.
The following is a list of advice that can be helpful in getting ready for a negotiation:
Do some research to find out what the norm is in this area. Find out what the going rate is for whatever it is that you are selling or purchasing so that you can avoid being taken advantage of. For instance, before going into a pay negotiation, you should be aware of what the average salary is for a person with your level of experience working in a specific area.
This piece of advice might appear to be elementary, but you’d be amazed to find out how many people fail to check their backyards before entering into a discussion. Always keep an eye out for opportunities to capitalize on the strengths of your position. In a similar vein, you should determine your weaknesses in order to prepare yourself for potential attacks.
Recognize where your limits lie. The previous piece of advice is connected to this one. As you investigate your position and your interests, it is essential to give some thought to the extent to which you are willing to make concessions as well as the aspects of your position that are non-negotiable. When you have a firm understanding of your limits, you will be less likely to enter into commitments that you may come to regret in the future. It will also assist you in determining the appropriate number of concessions to make during bargaining. One thing to keep in mind, though: you shouldn’t rule out the chance that you could shift your boundaries while the actual discussion is going on.
Put yourself in their position. Do you know what the most effective strategy is for preparing a negotiating stance? Take on the role of the opposing party. Ask yourself: if you were on the opposing side, what would it take for you to give in? What would you need to see or hear? If you are able to conduct in-depth study on the members of the opposing party as well as their positions, you will be in a better position. Are you going to have to interact with folks that have a reputation for being challenging? The question is, what makes them so challenging? Are they compelled by an emotional response to you? The planning of your approach can benefit from the utilization of information such as this.
Locate potential areas of negotiation. Now that you have researched not just your viewpoint but also the stance of the other side, it is time to locate the areas of agreement on which the two of you can collaborate. One method for accomplishing this is to search for areas of common interest. If you are able to emphasize that a shift stands to benefit both parties in a suitable way, then you will have a greater chance of getting an agreement to continue forward with the change.
Put oneself in the right frame of mind, both emotionally and physically. The process of negotiating can be an arduous endeavour. During the negotiation process, you need to be aware, in charge, and unemotional (but not emotionless), so it is important that you are in the appropriate physical condition. In certain circumstances, there will be a great deal of playing of games and posturing that takes on. Therefore, before heading to the table to bargain, it is recommended that you meditate, try to keep a clear head, and get a full night’s sleep.
Make arrangements for the time and place where the negotiations will take place. Context is an important factor to consider during negotiations. Because people who are uncomfortable are less inclined to make concessions, you need to make sure that the negotiation will take place at a time and location that is convenient for all of the parties involved. Before beginning a discussion, you will need to ensure that even the smallest aspects, such as the room temperature and the amount of space, are satisfactory. In addition, you need to make sure that the seating arrangement is one that allows for cordial conversation to take place. It could appear, as though there will be conflict if two parties sit directly across from each other. If you are seated too far apart from one another, it may give the impression that you are not interested in identifying things that you have in common. The use of chairs that are not identical can be interpreted as a power play.
Brief check
From time-to-time, whenever people are together, conflict and disagreement are bound to arise. People have different needs, wants, aims and beliefs and sometimes they clash. Negotiation is a process that can be used to address and resolve disagreements between people, and find common ground.
Groundwork
The manner in which a negotiation is opened has the potential to set the stage for the rest of the bargaining session. Therefore, it is essential that you give careful consideration to the manner in which either you or the other party initiate the negotiation. The following is a list of advice and strategies that can be utilized while beginning a negotiation:
Demonstrate an attitude of respect for the opposing party and openness to the process of negotiation. The act of negotiating has historically been seen as a hostile undertaking; however, this does not necessarily need to be the case. In point of fact, a simple act of kindness can help break the ice between two parties who are negotiating and facilitate a discussion that is sensible. Therefore, make an effort to engage in pleasantries and small conversation. Smile. Because, at the end of the day, you are both just people with interests to pursue, and you can do so without having to put anyone else down in the process, you can accomplish what you set out to do.
Put up a bid that is greater or higher than what you truly want. Always work under the assumption that the other side will want to negotiate with you, and because of this, you should always ask for more than you would be ready to settle for. Your bargaining allowance is equal to the amount that is over. It is important to keep in mind that the other party might be prepared to give you more than what you believe you deserve; therefore, there is nothing wrong with beginning the negotiation with an overly generous offer.
Do not take the first offer that you are given. Bear in mind that the other side will likely expect you to negotiate as well. Because it’s likely that the first offer you receive will be lower than what a person or corporation is ready to give you, you should spend some time trying to persuade them that you should be paid more.
Put your best attributes forward in this conversation. Always negotiate from a position of power; this is one of the most important rules in the art of bargaining. Don’t plead or defend yourself while you’re in a vulnerable position. Instead, immediately demonstrate the most appealing aspects of what it is that you can provide and convey the idea that it is worthwhile to inquire about you.
Brief check
’Old style’ negotiation involved trying to ‘win’, usually through a process that established ‘common ground’ where both sides gave something without going below their ‘bottom line’.More recently, negotiating styles have changed, with a recognition that working together to find a really good solution may be better for both parties.
Methods for getting things started
The act of bargaining itself is at the core of any successful negotiation process. There are instances when negotiation is simple, particularly in situations when the point of convergence between two viewpoints does not demand a significant amount of concession from either party. However, there are times when haggling can be rather a laborious process. It’s possible for negotiators to be stubbornly adamant about maintaining their positions, either because they truly do not believe they can afford a concession or because they want you to be the one to give up.
The following are some suggestions that will help you negotiate more successfully:
Listen. When beginning negotiators are first starting out, they frequently neglect an essential part of the process because they are so focused on what they want to say: listening. Spend some time attentively listening to what the other person is saying to you; they can provide you hints as to what is of value to them, as well as what kind of counteroffer can get them to give in. In a similar vein, pay attention to their non-verbal behaviour to gather information about how to adjust your tempo and demeanour.
Concede to get concessions. In the previous part of this article, we talked about the ability to “give in without giving up.” During the course of talks, you can also make use of this expertise. Your willingness to make concessions might be a technique to improve the other party’s position in the negotiation or demonstrate to them that you share a concern for what is in their best interests. For instance, you can promise to reduce the cost of the products you are selling on the condition that the customer purchases a greater quantity.
Your position should be anchored on objective data. This piece of advice pertains to the strategy of utilizing facts to sway people to your point of view. If you want to improve your position at the negotiating table, making references to objective criteria can help. One strategy that can help enhance your bargaining position is to publicly declare that you are willing to sell a product or provide a service for a price that is lower than the average retail price.
Provide alternatives. Everyone enjoys being given a selection of options to pick from since it gives them power and prevents them from feeling imprisoned. Create different packages that the other party can choose from if you have the financial means to do so. If you take the viewpoint that “there’s something for everyone,” you will have a better chance of winning.
Take care with your phraseology. If there is something you want, make sure that you express it in a way that is positive and helps the other person out. This will increase the likelihood that you will get what you want. Do not, for instance, make the claim that you possess a graduate degree and hence are entitled to a greater pay. Rather than that, you should emphasize the beneficial impact that your graduate degree can have on their bottom line. If you are able to demonstrate how your stance contributes to the advancement of the other party’s interests, then the negotiating process will move much more smoothly.
Brief check
Without negotiation, conflicts may lead to argument and resentment resulting in one or all of the parties feeling dissatisfied. The point of negotiation is to try to reach agreements without causing future barriers to communications.
Closing
It is just as crucial how you end out a negotiation as it is how you start one. You need to make it a point to settle on a deal that is agreeable to both parties before you walk away from the negotiating table. You should also make certain that you end on a positive note. After all, the completion of an agreement indicates the possibility of the beginning of a new relationship. The following are some suggestions that will help you close the deal:
Keep an eye out for any signs that indicate its time to call it a day. Maintain a heightened awareness of any shifts in the dynamic of the conversation at all times to ensure that you are provided with adequate notice when it comes time to wrap things up. If, for instance, the opposing side makes fewer objections and counterarguments, this can be an indication that they have all of the knowledge at their disposal that they require in order to reach a conclusion. In a similar vein, the request for a contract is frequently an indication that a decision has already been taken; all that remains to be done is to put it in writing.
Before making a final offer, there is some advise that you should think about. The back and forth nature of haggling can take some time, but if you listened to the advise about defining boundaries before entering into a negotiation, you would be able to tell when you have hit your limits. If you feel that you are at the point when you are about to give your final offer, and the other party appears to be feeling the same way, then issue a warning that is both delicate and forceful. You might, for instance, state “this is the last offer I will make” or “I believe I’ve made a decision.” The recommendation serves as a signal to the opposing party, telling them to present their best and last offer.
Raise the level of pressure. If the other party is still acting uncertainly despite the fact that you are prepared to finalize the transaction, it is possible that it is time to put pressure on them. It is common practice to achieve this by placing a time limit on the offer (for example, “This offer will expire at 2:00 p.m.”) or by demonstrating that you have additional choices available to you (by saying something like “I also have a proposal from XYZ company.”)
Summarise. One of the other ways to bring an end to a negotiation is to offer a summary of what has been accomplished so far. This should include a discussion of the problems that have been solved as well as the steps that are anticipated of the parties up to this point. As an illustration, you can say something along the lines of “we seem to agree on such-and-such particulars of the arrangement; we look forward to signing the contract tomorrow.” Because it leaves everyone with the impression that the time they spent was productive, a summary is an effective approach to bring an end to a negotiation. This is the case regardless of whether or not the negotiation led to a conclusion that was acceptable to both parties. You’ve laid the groundwork for additional conversations by highlighting the fact that you’ve made progress despite the fact that some problems still exist.
Put a final stamp on the agreement. Observe the ritual that is performed to signify the completion of an agreement. Typically, this entails actually signing the contract. In contexts that are less formal, this may take the form of a handshake. Even though they could appear to be empty rituals, they are actually a demonstration of dedication to what has been agreed upon and hence ought to be welcomed with open arms. Thank. The final step in your negotiation is to express gratitude. It demonstrates not only that you value the other person’s time and concern but also that you are respectful of the relationship’s inherent ethics.
Practical Application
Steven was invited to an interview for a new position as a bank manager. Before going in, he researched about the bank, learning about its financial situation, regional strengths and weaknesses, and overall company ethos. He also researched what kind of salary and benefits were standard for someone of his background entering the position. When he had a good idea of what he should expect, he looked at himself and his own strengths and weaknesses. He thought about areas where he could improve, and skills he had that made him stand out.
When he finally went in for the interview, he was confident in his knowledge. During his interview Steven noticed that the interviewers were also using job interview to assess his negotiation skills. They did so by asking him questions that required him to give examples of times he successfully used his negotiation skills.
Steven was well prepared so he employed all the negotiation skills he knew were important such as communication skills, persuasion and planning. Steven was able to influence a positive outcome and negotiated terms that were better than what he expected.